2004-05-26 - 4:30 p.m.
Just a quick but detailed spiel before I leave work. Might as well, have had a shitter of a day, who else am I gonna rant to? David?? Not likely.
I knew it was going to start bad when I walked outside and not only nearly broke my neck slipping on the porch stairs, but discovered my car was completely frosted over having spent its first night outside. (I couldn't get it in the garage because David didn't shift the firewood. Lord of the Rings was FAR more important.) So after some futile attempts at scratching the surface with my community services card, I ran back inside to grab a pot of hot water. Great lot of help that did, considering I still couldn't see properly and nearly crashed at several intersections on the way to work.
But that was the easy part of the day. I discover after some research that David has missed his bus to his WINZ appointment and once again I have to be the one to clean up after his shit. I call him, the sod is still in bed, he goes nuts and resolves to ring them straight away.
I.E he'll have a wank and go back to sleep.
He calls several more times during the day, complaining that WINZ is fucking him around (which they really are) and expecting me to call my mum to do something. I get VERY uncomfortable at this because he calls about ten times. Not very good.
Lunch rolls around, I end up eating about 8 of David's nuggets, feel immensely guilty due to diet once again going off the rails. But who cares if I'm fat, at least I might die of heart failure that way...
Come back to work, my boss walks in and sits opposite my desk. This is NEVER a good thing. Never. For one thing my boss hardly even talks to me. He starts with, "I've had a few comments passed down to me from some of the agents." Comments consist of too slow in getting work done, not enough creative flair, lack of communication, too young, not asking when they need things done...
Okay here are the flaws, in order, with those specific "comments":
Too slow in getting work done - um, hello, I haven't been given work in months.
Not enough creative flair - I certainly didn't see THAT in the job description, and I'm sorry but it's not my fault I'm artisitcally retarded.
Lack of communication - maybe so. This is probably the closest thing to truth so far.
Too young - LIKE THAT'S MY FUCKING FAULT! YOU WANT ME TO BUILD A TIME MACHINE AND CONVINCE MY PARENTS TO CONCEIVE ME ANY YOUNGER THAN THEY ALREADY WERE?!?!
Not asking when they need things done - woah woah woah, excuse me, but I have never had to ask people when they need things done. My job is to do things when they ask, not to run around with a clipboard asking if they'd like anything extra. I'm not a fucking secretarial waitress.
And so now I "may" be seeing the head honcho at Papanui to discuss this further. In other words, I'm probably going to be fired. I don't know why I'm so shocked and upset, I sorta knew in the back of my mind this was coming. I've never fitted in here at Kaiapoi, I miss Papanui sooo much. I HATE being in an office by myself, with no communication with anyone. So why should I care if I get fired? I can look for a better job.
I just don't want to be on the dole again. It fucking sucks.
So I've had a wee cry to myself and then sat up and thought what the fuck is wrong with you Sarah, you've been through worse than this.
(Anna FUCKING McCormack in the library - "check this out, heaviest person in the world...no surprise, it's Sarah McLaughlin)
I'd kick her in the face if I saw her today. Anyways why did I randomly bring her up? Haven't seen her in three years.
So yes, I could soon be unemployed again. Another great page for my family to be in their "we're so proud of her" album. Oh God, let me crash my car on the way home...
I wish David would stop calling me so often at work. I've told him not to but he still does. He called at 4.30 to tell me what happened on Pokemon. I got so pissed off I just said, "NO David you can't keep doing this! No no no!" Then I hung up. I've been saying to him lately "One day I'm going to walk out of this house and never come back."
Maybe tonight is the night.
